Soilman's Allotment Blog

Lilies in full flower

Regale species lilies flowering in late June

Kick Soilman Week

 

Lilies. That's how you know summer's finally here. Hurrah.

Other signs of summer:

• New potatoes – check
• Peas – check. Sort of. In a fortnight or so...
• Courgettes – er, none

No squashes either. The buggers are dying, and it's all my fault for planting them in uncomposted manure. An amateur mistake, and a blindingly stupid one. I am an utter dunce and I deserve a kicking.

Please, please: Kick me. You know it makes sense.

Peony perfection

Wow.

Thank heaven peonies only flower a few weeks of the year. Longer than that and they'd blind you.

Darling buds of May

Question: What's the worst possible day of the year for frost?

Answer: May 20th, give or take a day or two.

The allotment was white at 6am, and I feared the worst. It's just late enough for all the early spuds (and most of the maincrop) to have broken the surface. Plus I had sweetcorn planted out.

Amazingly, everything was OK. The temperature must have just hovered above the point where damage is done.

So what's that got to do with the lily in the picture? Bugger all. I just think budding lilies are rather beautiful*.

* Translation: I left the sodding camera at home this morning, so this is the only pic I've got.

Dear God: Enough already

More deceptive weather, more deceptive growth. Any other time, and I'd welcome sprouting lilies. Now they seem like a bad joke; tonight we're getting sleet and snow.

I realise, of course, that this allotment blog is taking on a Cassandra-like character. All you get is moans and weather warnings. Like Jenna Jameson reading the shipping forecast.

All I can say is: if you're not whingeing, could you please start? If enough of us rant at the Almighty, He might deign to cancel winter.

He's clearly not getting the message from me.

Heralds of...Winter

Pretty tasty, huh? These are sitting just outside my garden door, and the smell is so strong it's indecent. I'm almost excited about it.

Almost. But not quite.

You see, it's a false dawn. Winter's back with a vengeance at the weekend: snow is forecast. So here we go again.

Will this sodding winter ever let go?

Lilium regale seedlings

I'm fed up with pictures of pots. I want to be out on the allotment. You know, growing vegetables. Not poncing around with a camera like a horse's arse.

*Sighs heavily*

You'll gather from the above that the UK weather's been shit. And I mean, really shit. 'Gale' seems a trite word for such destructive power.

So while I'm stuck here, being a horse's arse (again), I thought I'd show you how the lily seedlings are coming on.

These are the cotyledon leaves, which grow from the seed case. The first true leaves should emerge any moment now.

And who knows? I may even do some bloody gardening one of these days.

Promises, promises

I have three hippeastrums flowering at the same time and I'm thrilled.

Shame I can't say the same about the vegetable plot. Haven't been since Saturday. No point – it's deader than a dead thing in a cemetery.

It even looks a bit like a cemetery. Give me a few mourners and a hearse and you'd never know the difference.

This weekend, though, it's going to be different. The potatoes are definitely going in. I'll finish the digging and edging. I may even hoe weeds and plant onion sets.

And pigs might fly.

Most excellent, dude

Very flattered to be given a vote of confidence by Melinda at Elements in Time. I'd like to thank my wife, my agent and my pussycat.

Ashamed to say I'm ducking the challenge of naming 10 other excellent blogs. Seems invidious to pick out 'specials' from so many great bloggers. Suffice to say that every site in my 'Other Blogs' list has my implicit approval. I enjoy them all.

Seeing as it's still winter, and I still can't sow seed seriously (wow, get that alliteration), I'm reduced to posting more flower pix. Check out this gorgeous Paphiopedilum orchid:

PS I'm aware this is a vegetable gardening blog. Honest. Cut me some slack here.

Name that flower

Well, here it is. Spring has sprung. This gorgeous daffodil had barely opened before it was felled by a -5C frost last night. But hey. It's the thought that counts.

Visited the new glasshouse at Wisley RHS yesterday. Was amused to see this pendulous 'flower', which put me in mind of... well, it made my wife laugh, anyway.

So here's a Soilman quiz: What is it? No cash prizes for correct answers, I'm afraid, just the Shackleton Special.